Stress is with us all the time. It comes from mental, emotional and physical activities. It is unique and personal to each of us. So personal, in fact, that what may be relaxing to one person may be stressful to another.

Too much emotional stress can cause physical illness such as high blood pressure, ulcers, or even heart disease; physical stress from work or exercise is not likely to cause such ailments. Physical exercise can actually help you to relax and to handle mental or emotional stress.

Stress is defined as a "non-specific response of the body to a demand." It's important that each individual learn to recognize "stressors" and how his or her body reacts to various demands and "stressors."

When stress becomes prolonged or particularly frustrating, it can become harmful -- causing distress or "bad stress." Recognizing the early signs of distress and then doing something about them can make an important difference in the quality of your life, and may actually influence the length of your life.

The Stress Reaction

To use stress in a positive way and prevent it from becoming distress, become familiar with your own personal reactions to stressful events. The body responds to stress by going through three stages:

1. Alarm

2. Resistance

3. Exhaustion

If a car suddenly pulls out in front of you in rush-hour traffic, your initial alarm reaction may include fear of an accident, anger at the driver who committed the action, and general frustration.

Alarm Stage

Your body may respond in the alarm stage by releasing hormones into the bloodstream which causes your face to flush, perspiration to form, your stomach to have a sinking feeling, and your arms and legs to tighten.

Resistance

The next stage is resistance, in which the body repairs damage caused by the stress. If the stress of driving continues with repeated close calls or traffic jams, however, your body will not have time to make repairs. You may become so conditioned to expect potential problems when you drive that you tighten up at the beginning of each commuting day.

Exhaustion

Eventually, you may even develop a physical problem that may be related to stress, such as migraine headaches, high blood pressure, back aches, or insomnia.

While it is impossible to live completely free of stress and distress, it is possible to prevent some distress as well as to minimize its impact when it can't be avoided.

There are two ways to deal with stress:

1. Eliminate or reduce the cause or source of stress.

2. Change your perception about and reaction to the stress- causing event or source.

Choices for Dealing With Stress

When stress occurs, it is important to first recognize the cause or source of the stress and ways to deal with it. If reducing or eliminating the cause or source is not an option in a particular situation, then it is important to learn to handle the stressful situation.

Some techniques:

Increase your physical activity: When you are nervous, angry, or upset, release the pressure through exercise or physical activity. Running, walking, playing tennis, swimming or working in your garden are just some of the activities you might try. Physical exercise will relieve that "up tight" feeling and relax you. Remember, the mind and body work together.

Share your stress: It helps to talk to someone about your concerns and worries. A friend, family member, teacher, or counselor can help you see your problem in a different light. Joining one of our online mutual-support groups might also be helpful. Or visit the If you feel your problem is serious, you might seek professional help from a psychologist, psychiatrist, social worker, or mental health counselor.

Knowing when to ask for help may avoid more serious problems later.

Recognize your limits: If a problem is beyond your control and cannot be changed at the moment, don't fight the situation. Learn to accept what is -- for now -- until such time when you can change it. Focus on changing those situations (or people) that are within your power to change and accepting those situations (or people) that you cannot change.

Take care of your mind and your body: Get enough rest and eat well. If you are irritable and tense from lack of sleep or if you are not eating correctly, you will have less ability to deal with stressful situations. If stress repeatedly keeps you from sleeping, you should talk with your physician or a counselor about the problem.

Make more time for fun and laughter: Schedule time for both work and recreation. Play can be just as important to your well being as work; you need a break from your daily routine to just relax, have fun and laugh.

Become more of a participant: One way to keep from getting bored, sad, and lonely is to go where it's all happening. Sitting alone can make you feel frustrated. Instead of feeling sorry for yourself, get involved and become a participant. Offer your services in neighborhood or volunteer organizations. Help yourself by helping other people. Get involved in the world and the people around you.

Prioritize tasks and your time: Trying to take care of everything at once can seem overwhelming, and, as a result, you may not accomplish anything. Instead, make a list of what tasks you have to do, then do one at a time, checking them off as they're completed.

Give priority to the most important ones and do those first. Ask yourself, "What is the worst possible outcome, if I do not accomplish a particular task or if I eliminate it from my list?"

Become more cooperative: Do other people upset you -- particularly when they don't do things your way? Try cooperation instead of confrontation; it's better than fighting and always being "right." A little give and take on both sides will reduce the strain and make you both feel more comfortable.

Learn to cry: A good cry can be a healthy way to bring relief to your distress, and it might even prevent a headache or other physical consequence.

Dream & Visualize Peacefulness: Create a quiet scene. You can't always run away, but you can "dream the impossible dream." A quiet country scene painted mentally, or on canvas, can take you out of the turmoil of a stressful situation. Change the scene by reading a good book or playing beautiful music to create a sense of peace and tranquility.

Avoid self-medication and alcohol: Although you can use medications to relieve stress temporarily, they do not remove the conditions that caused the stress in the first place. Medications may be habit-forming and also may reduce your efficiency, thus creating more stress than they take away. They should be taken only on the advice of your doctor.

Learn To Relax

The best strategy for avoiding the negative effects of stress is to learn how to relax. Unfortunately, many people try to relax at the same pace that they lead the rest of their lives. For a while, tune out your worries about time, productivity, and "doing right."

You will find satisfaction in just being, without striving. Find activities that give you pleasure and that are good for your mental and physical well-being. Focus on relaxation, enjoyment, and health.